Lights, Camera, Action

Neon bathers – tick

Contouring – tick

Biceps – tick

I waited in line with the competitors.

I surrendered to the moment.  I leaned in.

Cameras flashed,  lights and music pulsed through my body.

I was in the spotlight and on cloud nine.

1st October 2022 – My first bodybuilding competition. ICN WA State Titles 2022 and the culmination of 9 months of commitment, dedication, and sacrifice.

I’ve entered 4 divisions. Fitness model first time, Fitness model 30+, Sports model first timer and Sports model Novic.

It’s my proudest moment to date and I high-fived myself inside.

A new way to move.

So, how did I end up in a bodybuilding competition you might ask.

Well, I’ve always enjoyed fitness and gym life. While travelling in my early 20s, I explored different ways to move and train. I tried Pilates, hot Bikram yoga, Zumba and…weightlifting.

OMG, I loved it, and I was intrigued by it. The incredible physique you got with the right training and nutrition.

A trainer asked me to compete.

I was flattered and tempted.

The time wasn’t right. I had other priorities. I was young, on the move, and trying different things. I didn’t know enough about nutrition and ultimately, I knew I wouldn’t be able to give it 100%. 

But the seed was sown.

The catalyst

A few years later while working in hospitality. Covid interrupted life as we know it. I loved my job, but something didn’t fit anymore. I had to make a change, find my purpose and set myself a big goal. Covid was the catalyst for a new chapter.

Around the same time, I discovered a health & wellness brand with incredible products, so I started a small online business. It felt right, learning about nutrition and my body – and it was fun. Such a positive use of my free time – happy days.

Fuel for the mind

The idea I might someday compete in a bodybuilding competition never went away. When I thought about it, I was lit up. There was a fire in my belly.

I had a burning desire to set a date and start training. I knew I had it in me and I wanted to push my body to its limits.

But life happened – new opportunities came along, and I rode that wave happily.   

Until then – I read up on bodybuilding competitions. I was inspired by the physique and body composition competitors achieved. I knew in my heart that someday I would go the extra distance – train harder, better, and faster to be able to compete.

Ready

January 2022 and it was time.  ICN WA State Titles.

I found my coach.  I was halfway through my nutrition course which made me understand it much better.

In the beginning, I found the prep easy. Almost cruisey. I enjoyed putting a structure around training and eating well and I felt challenged.

I trained 6 days a week—weight lifting plus a few cardio sessions. On top of that, my meal prep was critical. Good nutrition in very precise quantities every single day for 9 months.

I was feeling good. Before training, I’d had lower back issues and knee pain. Both had gone. I was in the best shape of my life.

And I had found my groove.

Mind over Muscle

Then my circumstances changed. A house move meant my studies had to go on hold. But I continued to build my business and train for the competition while settling into a new town.

With no supportive community around me, I struggled big time. I didn’t want to share my journey. My mindset is massive and I wanted to protect myself.

I couldn’t be open for fear of trolls. Bodybuilding and weight training are alien, especially for females. It’s perceived as extreme, and people are very quick to judge behaviours they don’t understand. How would trolls have affected me? I’m not sure but I wasn’t willing to risk it so only a few people knew what I was in training for. I sacrificed some relationships and social life.

“I am not a quitter. I have never been. I don’t just drop something without finishing it… I was brought up like that. You must work hard for the things you want.”

And no one forced this on me.

It was my choice.

My journey.

My hard.

I stuck to the plan and I did the work. I found the joy in the discipline (I’ll get that printed on a t-shirt one day J)

Me vs Me

With a few weeks to go – I nearly pulled the plug.

Drowning in expectations.

I was anxious about launching my business. Bringing the website to life was hard and it left me weary.

And those cravings – man they were intense. You can be as prepared and focused as you like but when hormones are involved, all bets are off. I’m not gonna lie. I was hungry and emotional every day.

I was haunted by the pressure of performing and posing too. Stepping on stage to be judged on my physique felt weird in so many ways.

When you listen to the mental chatter, it can take over. Having the right people around me At that moment was pivotal.

They understood.

“You’ve come so far.

You can do it.

Pull your sh&t together.”

They knew what I needed to hear.

Final countdown

On the eve of the competition, I was highly charged with electricity flowing through my (highly visible) veins.

I reflected on the ups and downs of the 9 months –the crippling self-doubt, the sheer exhaustion from training, the pride at my transformation both mentally and physically and now – the anticipation.

I was ready to channel the nerves for peak performance!

The Finish Line?

On the day itself, it wasn’t about winning.

I had finally learned how my body works and what it’s capable of. I learned to listen to my body and let go of negative self-talk. I no longer subscribe to diet culture or stress about numbers on the scales.

I’m mentally stronger than ever before and I’m physically fitter and faster in my 30’s than in my 20’s.

“I’m very proud of what I achieved – my discipline and patience.”

Competition day once seemed like the finish line!

But really, I’ve learned it’s simply the end of one race and the beginning of another…

Watch this space…